It has been well over a month since my transition of care began and I am still no clearer on the situation than I was before. During this period I’ve met with my ‘mental health care team’ or whatever they choose to refer to themselves as, once. I did meet with a member of the Early Psychosis Intervention team during this time, but they were of no help whatsoever and it was an unfortunate waste of time. This means that I have been left with no psychiatrist or any form of professional help within the mental health sector for quite some time.
This would not be of much concern to me, except for the fact that both my psychiatrist and all the other members of my mental health care team believed I was manic, yet I still haven’t heard anything from them and have been left to my own devices; which has led to my illicit drug use increasing, although that may have been unavoidable regardless of their intervention. I am unmedicated by choice and have been for a few months now, this has given them more reason to monitor me; particularly my psychiatrist. However this ceased once the transition of care began, which is out of my psychiatrists hands and I hold her in no way responsible for what has and is occurring.
If you haven’t previously noticed, I think very highly of my psychiatrist and found she helped me far more than I could have imagined. She was exceptionally good at her job and was a wonderful person in general. Due to this I did want to avoid this transition of care, however we both knew that it was unavoidable. I do miss her quite a lot for these reasons, and it also causes me to think that there’s probably a very slim chance that I will have such an outstanding psychiatrist again. I was also unfortunate enough to find out that she has been seriously ill for quite some time, which makes me worry about her quite a lot, but hopefully she’ll recover quickly and be back to doing what she loves soon.
Thankfully, for the past couple of months and during the current moment, I am no way in need of my mental health care team. I may be slightly manic, but I have everything under control to a certain degree; and I have found I am far happier as of late, and life has been pretty great in general. I have managed to keep boundaries and restraints with myself in order to avoid going into full blown mania, and have been heavily focusing on my writing which is beginning to pay off. However, I do know that I need to slow down or I’m just going to crash and burn, I have a tendency to fall apart when my life is continuously getting better.
As long as I can keep on this path, I should be completely fine until all of this is resolved. It’s always a waiting game with the NHS.